Déjà Vu
by HoneyBee1
Summary: Many of us wish we could get a do-over in life, a chance to change the past and make it go differently. If you had the chance, would you actually want to do it?
1. Birthday Bash

_**Title**__: __Déjà vu_

_**Pairing/Characters**__: Everyone_

_**Rating**__: M_

_**Spoiler**__: Time Travel, AU_

_**Disclaimer**__: VM's characters and universe belong to Rob Thomas._

_**Summary**__: If you are given a chance to change something in the past, would you do it?_

_**Author's Note**__: Thank you so much for _**sakurablue13**_ as always for being my awesome beta reader._

* * *

Veronica was running very fast. Her legs burned with pain, but she kept pushing on. People yelled and scattered away as she went after a bail jumper through crowded street. The bail jumper, a Jamaican man in his 20s was a fast on his feet and much younger than her. The wind blew at his dreadlocks as he ran; pushing everyone from his path. Veronica had to jump over several obstacles, almost tumbling down in the process. But her tiny frame didn't stop her from moving as lightning.

The man turned right into an alley, and it was a dead end. Veronica caught up to him and stopped several feet, brandishing her gun and pointing it to him. "Goddamn it, Dequain! When I said 'STOP'; it means no fucking run!"

Dequain was clearly high on drugs, pulling out a butterfly knife instead, and ready to fight Veronica. "I ain't going back to jail mon!"

Veronica looked at him in disbelief. "Dequain, I'm holding a gun. I can shoot you before you stab me, you moron."

Dequain didn't hear her. Probably couldn't hear her anyway, because he was shaking like a leaf and looked like a wild animal. His had bloodshot eyes and was sweating profusely; clearly he was high. Veronica gritted her teeth. Her hands were steady holding the gun.

Dequain charged forward while yelling. Deciding she could handle him without shooting the gun, Veronica twirled and kicked Dequain right in the stomach, dropping him to the ground like a sack of potato. Veronica sighed and put her gun in her holster. She turned around hearing someone running into the alley.

Jeff stopped in front of her, panting heavily, and tried to say something. Veronica threw her partner an annoyed look, as she collected Dequain's butterfly knife. Finally after a while, Jeff made out a croak, "I see you caught him." Veronica just shook her head and handed over Jeff the knife. "What did you do, hit him with your tiny powerful fist?"

"Something like that." She nudged him with the tip of her boot. "This ass was trying to stab me."

"Can we go home?" Jeff whined. "I almost had a heart attack. The guy is doped with _Fairy Dust_, I think. He ran so fast, he was almost flying."

"Ratner, if you were guarding the backyard like I told you, we wouldn't have chased him for 6 blocks. Now, give me a hand, will 'ya?" She grabbed Dequain's collar to wake him up, but before accomplishing anything, Dequain's eyes popped open. He shoved on his feet, blew a powder to her face, and head-butted Veronica. Veronica crumpled to the ground, surprising Jeff. Dequain was already heading toward Jeff, who quickly pulled out his gun, smacking Dequain right in the head with the butt of the gun. Dequain hit the ground again and this time he stayed down.

"Oh, shit. Mars, are you okay?" Jeff crouched to peer down at Veronica who was groaning with her face in her hand. As she spluttered and coughed, he then saw that her face was covered in white powder. He looked around and saw a leaking pipe from the next building. Placing a gentle hand under her elbow, he took Veronica to the running water to wash her face.

"Arrrrghhh… Fucking bastard!" Veronica's vision was blurred by tears. "Cuff him and make sure you cuff his feet too!" Jeff obliged, bounding both Dequain's hands and feet. Veronica continued to wipe her face with Jeff's wet handkerchief, cursing all the way.

* * *

"You really need to see a doctor about that bruise, Mars." Jeff said as he dropped her off at her house. Veronica just waved her hands from outside his car. He rolled his eyes. "Oh of course the great Veronica Mars is invincible, she is FINE when a jacked up Jamaican sprinkled _Fairy Dust_ and hit her in the head!"

"I am OKAY. Will you relax? I didn't inhale anything and I took a shower. Look, I even walk fine. You keep asking since we left Vegas." She propped her arms on the passenger's side window and looked at Jeff inside the car. "All I need is a nice bubble bath and a glass of wine, and I'll be awesome again."

Jeff shook his head. "Alright, I'll see you tomorrow night then."

Veronica frowned. "Do we have a dinner plan or something? I don't remember."

Jeff shot her an amused look. "Looks like your got hit pretty hard after all. You don't remember?"

"Remember what?" asked Veronica.

He grinned. "Nothing. You'll find out soon enough. See you tomorrow, Mars." He then drove away from her house. Veronica followed his car with a confused look.

Veronica entered her house, a black Rottweiller greeting her happily. "Hello, Captain. You've been good?" She patted her dog, looked around the house, and dropped her keys to the table. "I'm home!"

A seventeen years old girl with dirty blonde hair and blue eyes walked out the kitchen, a bucket of chicken in hands and busy munching. "Wlcm hm! Hws Vgas?" she said with a mouth-full. Veronica stared at her daughter with wide eyes.

"Beth! What did I say about talking and eating at the same time?" She dropped a kiss to her daughter's cheek who was still chewing. "I'm so glad you've maintained a healthy proportion considering that you eat like a pig." She watched her daughter swallowed and licked her fingers, all the while walking back into the kitchen, when noticing that she was wearing a soccer uniform and her knee socks were dirty and the floor was full of dirt. "Beth… please clean the kitchen, 'kay?"

"Fine," Beth answered. "After I finished eating this finger licking good fried chicken." She smacked her lips and attacked another chicken.

"Where's your brother?" Veronica asked while flipping over the mails.

"Moping around in his room, thinking about that girl what's her face." Beth shrugged. She slurped a soda and burped. Veronica rolled her eyes; her daughter was such a tomboy ever since she was a little girl. Veronica gave up teaching her daughter about ponies and unicorns, for apparently she preferred ninjas and soccer. Nothing wrong with those and as a mother, she was proud that her daughter was an independent teenager with strong will. But sometimes she missed the mother-daughter bonding time, such as shopping for clothes and talking about boys.

Beth preferred to fight and her grandfather was delighted with that. Keith even bought her a mini stun baton for protection.

"Aren't you gonna save some of those chicken for me and your brother?" asked Veronica. Beth turned to her as if not understanding the question. "Never mind." She sighed and went upstairs to her son's room. She knocked on the door and opened it. A very handsome boy with dark hair was strumming his guitar, his face subdued. Veronica rolled her eyes; her son, the prince of emo, as expected, was feeling melancholic. "Good evening, son." Veronica greeted Scott formally and sat next to him on the bed.

"Is the day so late?" Replied Scott. "Welcome back, mother." Her son was always melodramatic. Both Beth and Scott were twin siblings.

"Have you eaten, Scott? Do you wanna order some Thai or something? Your sister apparently won't share her dinner."

"I already ate…" He looked at his mother guiltily. "At dad's apartment. We had pizza…"

Veronica's face was blank. It something she was good at; hiding her emotion. She just shrugged and ruffled her son's hair. "Okay, then. I can order some Thai for myself. More food for me!" She said cheerfully. She stood up and looked around the room to find something interesting.

"Are you okay?" asked Scott. "You have a bruise on your cheek."

Veronica gave him a dismissing wave. "A guy head butted me when I was trying to bring him to custody."

"Mom…" Scott began.

"As you can see, I'm fine. And hungry. So don't make a big deal out of it." She raised her forefinger at him as she warned.

Scott sighed deeply, looking forlornly at his mother. "I'm not… I know you can take care of yourself. You're a kick ass mom. My friends even thought you're hot." He shuddered a bit at the thought. "But dad won't like it…"

"He doesn't have to know, right?" Veronica reached to her son's face and started kissing his cheeks, his forehead, and soon, his whole face with a resounding smack.

"Mom, stop it! Ew, ew!" He squirmed trying to get away. "Okay, I won't tell! Although I think he will find out anyway, judging from that big shiner." He pointed to her cheek.

"So where's your uncle Darrell? I thought he's supposed to baby sit you guys?" Veronica swiftly changed the subject.

"Uncle Darrell had to pick up Uncle Wallace, Aunt Rhonda, and Collette from Aunt Rhonda's parents house. You know they're coming here tomorrow night with Grandpa Keith and Grandma Alicia, right?" Scott raised his eyebrows.

"Why?" She frowned uncomprehendingly.

"Your birthday party…" He said carefully. "Your birthday is tomorrow, doy?"

"Oh, shit." It struck Veronica and was immediately horrified, while Scott winced at his mom's curse. "It's tomorrow? B-b-but I just got back! I haven't bought any food yet!" She scrambled out from Scott's room and made a dash down the stairs noisily. Scott could hear his mom yelling to Beth to clean the kitchen and the door slammed, then the sound of his mom starting her car and drove away.

When Beth reached her brother's door, Scott was humming a song while strumming the guitar. Still clutching the bucket of chicken, she confirmed her suspicion. "Did you tell her about her own birthday party?" Her brother calmly nodded and continued humming as she groaned. "Can you just for one second not being pathetic? Your ex is a whore."

"Shut the fuck up, Beth!"

"Don't forget about the present for mom tomorrow. We're giving it to her at the party, not before. Hopefully, Dad is gonna be there." She reminded him only for Scott to give her another nod and continue strumming the guitar. Beth scoffed and exited her twin brother's room.

* * *

"Happy birthday!"

Beth jumped up her mom's bed and hugged her tightly, eliciting a surprised yelp out of Veronica. Behind her, Scott was carrying a breakfast tray. Veronica was touched to see her children had prepared her a breakfast in bed.

"It's not much, just some toast and eggs and bacon… lots of bacon. Enjoy the clogging artery, many happy returns." Scott placed the tray on his mom's lap. "Of course, I was the one who cooked – Beth didn't help at all." His eyes were shooting daggers at his twin sister, but Beth reciprocated with an equally heated look.

"I poured the coffee!" She said defiantly.

"Enough you two… Thank you so much. This is awesome." She awarded both of her children with a kiss each. "I love you so much." Scott kissed his mom back on the cheek and had started to walk out the room when Veronica said, "Please clean the kitchen both of you, 'kay? Tonight the guests are arriving." She could hear Scott groaned out his reluctance.

Beth was about to leave too, when she turned around and asked, "Did dad call? Or maybe he texted?"

Veronica peered at her daughter as she took a sip of her coffee, and then shook her head. "No, sweetie."

"Oh. I thought he would call, you know – usually he calls." Beth said attempted to say it casually, but it was a long shot.

"Well, I don't think he remembers my birthday. He has his own life, honey." Veronica watched with mild annoyance at Beth who scowled.

"Scott went to his apartment yesterday to play some music…" Her daughter informed, ratting out her brother as she trailed off.

"And?" Knowing what Beth was going to say, Veronica changed her object of focus to the food over her lap. Her children had been throwing words about it for the past few weeks, giving hints about something, or trying to put the parents together in the same room.

"Scott said that dad is still in love with you." Beth told her bluntly. "He said that he's sorry about everything and hopefully you could forgive him."

Veronica put down her fork hard, this time giving a stern look. "Thank you for breakfast, _Elizabeth_. Could you help your brother cleaning the kitchen, please? And don't forget to feed the dog and take him for a walk."

Beth bit her bottom lip and nodded. Her mother could get scary when a conversation about their dad arises. She walked out from her mother's room without a word.

Veronica sighed and wiped her eyes from a tear that was forming, wincing when she touched her bruise.

* * *

Veronica's house was filled with people who came to celebrate her birthday. She didn't have to worry about not having enough food or even decorate the house, as long it was clean. Scott and Beth had been cleaning since morning, begrudgingly, while Veronica prepared the plates and cups in the backyard along with snacks such as pretzels and also soft drinks.

The guests arrived around 6 PM and it was still summer so the sun was still bright. They brought foods that could feed an army. Dick – unsurprisingly - brought a beer keg while Mac had veggie lasagna with her. Their sons, Richard III and Cameron were in the same grade as Scott and Beth.

Wallace, Rhonda, and their daughter, Collette – who was the same age as the other teens – brought in desserts, also a birthday cake. And Darrell came accompanied by his girlfriend, Shaniqua, and a big present with a bow in hands.

Veronica jiggled her present and smiled, "You brought me a mini pony?"

Eli and Carmen made appearance bringing burritos, Beth's favorite food – which she was so grateful, she gave the two crushing hugs. Felix and Esmeralda, the couple's children, were much younger than Veronica's, but they were close.

The teenagers were hanging out immediately, away from their parents.

Keith and Cliff had the grill. They knew it was unorthodox to have BBQ at night, but it was summer and this was a special occasion. They were talking with their colleagues from the fire department. It was a simple birthday party with friends and families, nothing fancy but a backyard party.

Alicia fussed at Veronica's bruise, which she just shrugged it out. Keith read her the riot act and she just rolled her eyes. It was her 38th birthday, Keith was treating her like a child, and she wouldn't have it any other way.

Everybody hugged her and wished her happy birthday at her when they arrived. Veronica laughed when Dick teased her about getting old, and she kindly retaliated by saying that she could still kick his ass. Mac playfully hit her husband and joined the laughter.

Everyone was happy and having a good time; eating, drinking, and talking. Veronica was so grateful for having her friends and family together like this. She may not like the whole idea of turning 38, but she was thankful enough about her life. She was a great private detective, her children were in high school with good grades, her father was happily married with her best friend's mother, her best friend was happily married with a gorgeous daughter, and her friends were also happily married.

She didn't even think about her ex-husband, who had apparently forgotten her birthday. No text message, no calls... Didn't matter, it would make things easier – no awkward moments or even tension between them especially in front of their children.

They sang her happy birthday and Veronica blew the candles away filled with wishes. Everyone cheered and she couldn't help but giggle. Scott and Beth planted kisses on her cheeks and she hugged them both. Photos were taken and the video camera was rolling; Veronica hugging and posing with everyone in the party, especially with her family.

"Present for you, mother." In such a gentleman style, Scott bowed and presented to her a jewelry box. Beth rolled her eyes at her brother's use of the word 'mother'.

Veronica smiled and took the jewelry box, jiggling it. Before she managed to comment, Beth cut her off. "It's not a pony!"

Veronica sighed, pinching her daughter's nose, and opened it. There laid a locket necklace. She clicked the locket open, and her gaze fell to pictures of Scott and Beth when they were babies. Tears welled up in her eyes as she lifted her head and looked at her children.

"Where did you get this?" She croaked.

Scott and Beth communicated with their eyes. "Well… it's a secret." Beth answered carefully.

"But, do you like it?" asked Scott.

Veronica choked a sob and drew her children into a tight hug. "I love it. And I love you both." She kissed both of them and shooed them to their friends and cousin. Grinning from ear to ear, the twins kissed back their mother before returning to their table.

Veronica gave the locket another look and put it around her neck.

This turned out to be a nice birthday after all.

And then she saw Leo arriving.

"Hey, Leo. You made it." Veronica walked to Leo and greeted him softly with a smile. Leo stopped in front of her instead looking and seemed to be in turmoil.

"Veronica." He greeted balefully. His stare was fixed at her and at her bruised cheek. He touched and caressed it carefully. No matter what, he would always think of her as beautiful.

Back in the party, Scott nudged Beth and signaled at Veronica and Leo. The two eyed both adults curiously. They became more curious when several deputies from the sheriff department arrived, all wearing solemn faces.

Leo was in his uniform and he was pulling back his hand from Veronica. People at the party had stopped what they were doing and watched as Leo and his deputies came closer. Leo closed his eyes and sadly whispered, "I'm sorry, Veronica. But I have no choice."

Seeing Leo taking out his handcuffs had everybody suddenly aware of the situation. Scott and Beth started running towards their mom, but Eli and Dick stopped them. "Mom!" Scott yelled, echoed by his sister.

"Easy, kids." Eli tried calming the children. He and the rest of the guests were shocked to see Sheriff Leo D'Amato put the handcuffs on Veronica's hands and recited her Miranda's right.

"Veronica Mars, you're under arrest. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to speak to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you. Do you understand these rights as they have been read to you?" Leo asked.

Veronica was too dumbfounded to answer.

Cliff immediately was at her side. "I'm her attorney! Why are you arresting her? On what charge?"

"For the murder of Jeff Ratner last night." Leo explained. "He was stabbed to death. A witness saw Veronica left his house last night. We also found her fingerprints on the murder weapon."

Everyone gasped in shock. "WHAT?" Keith roared. He was walking wobbly towards Veronica and Leo, but Wallace stopped him. "Let go of me, Wallace!" The other deputies were blocking the guests from protesting, it was chaos.

Beth cried, desperately trying to reach for her mother, but Dick held her tight. Scott was under restrained by Eli, screaming for his mom. Captain was barking, bucking wildly to get close to Veronica, but Darrell held a firm grip over his leash.

Veronica suddenly felt a pang of pain in her head.

She couldn't breathe.

She looked around; everything seemed to be out of focus and spinning. Voices and faces went blurry and mixing into each other.

She could hear everyone singing happy birthday.

She could hear everyone yelling.

She could see everyone was smiling.

She could smell the bacon from this morning.

She could hear Scott humming his song.

She could hear Beth saying something.

"_Dad is still in love with you…"_

Veronica was trying to focus when everything went black, and all she could hear was the screaming and yelling and she could feel Leo frantically trying to wake her up.

But then… everything went silent.

It was like being under the sea where the sounds were muffled.

She opened her eyes and realized that she was under a blanket. She sat up and looked around. She was in a familiar room. She blinked her eyes and shook her head in disbelief. She immediately bounced off the water bed. Wait, _water bed?_

She was in her old room in that old apartment. What the hell was going on? She felt weird, a bit light instead of heavy. She looked down at her hands; her hands were smaller and smoother. She touched her hair; it was shorter.

She walked into her bathroom and glanced at the mirror above the sink.

And she saw her young self staring back at her.

She was seventeen again.

"Fuuuuuckkkkk….." She whispered.


	2. Be Kind, Rewind

_**Author's Note 1**__: I apologize that I didn't update this sooner. As I explained in my other fic, I was going to update in March. Unfortunately the tsunami happened, and a friend of family is missing in Japan. So I went into terrible mood ever since. But now I am able to move on and write some more. Thank you everyone who subscribed, favorited, and reviewed this fic! I really appreciate it!_

_**Author's Note 2**__: *soap opera announcer* The role of beta reader is now being played by the amazing __**steenbeans**__! I am so lucky! Thank you so much for the feedback and the pointers for the fic. As a non English speaker, this is really helpful for me. I hope this would make me a better writer. Please enjoy the story, everyone!_

_**Author's Note 3**__: Oh, one more thing – there will be two POVs in this story; Veronica's and others. Basically this fic is a REBOOT from the original show, by adding a sci-fi element. Now, I know this is risqué, so please let me know whether I should stick with Veronica's POV only or include others too. I appreciate it. And kudos to reviewer __**Iamtired**__, who guessed correctly that the first chapter, was homage to __Peggy Sue Got Married__. My favorite guilty pleasure movie!_

* * *

Veronica looked at herself in the mirror, and touched her face. She couldn't believe what had happened. What the fuck was going on? She looked at her eyes, nose, lips, tongue, hair, ears, neck – she even checked her breasts; she cupped her breasts and noticed they were still supple and firm, unlike a woman's breasts who had delivered twins.

She pinched herself in the arm, and yelped.

"Okay, Veronica Mars. Get a fucking grip." She grimaced and looked around. She saw her closet, and opened it. She looked at her wardrobe; clothes from when she was younger, colorful tees, small waist jeans… "Holy shit, this can't be happening." She looked at her desk, and noticed her computer and her school books. The wall was covered with pictures of couples, strangers most of them. And she looked at a frame above her water bed. She grabbed it; it was a picture of her and Lilly Kane.

Veronica realized that she was in her small apartment, not in her house – so this meant that Lilly was already dead. But did the murderer already get caught? Did Aaron…

The room suddenly became smaller and smaller, and she couldn't breathe. She didn't know what had happened, but she was a teenager again – with the mind of 38 year old. She sat on her water bed, and she tried to focus. _Okay, Veronica. Think! THINK! You've seen a lot of sci-fi movies and TV shows. You watched 'Doctor Who' and 'Quantum Leap' reruns. You saw that movie 'Back To The Future'… I think this is similar, right? Don't panic. Don't panic. Don't fucking panic! Oh my God, I'm in the 'Twilight Zone'! I'm literally dead, and stuck in fucking limbo!_

Veronica wanted to scream. She just couldn't comprehend this whole thing. One minute she was having a birthday party with her friends and family, and the next…

She stood up fast. Her 38th birthday party… Leo had come to the party and arrested her for the murder of Jeff Ratner, her PI partner. That was impossible; the last time she'd seen Jeff was when he'd dropped her off at her house the previous night. But Leo said that there was a witness who'd seen her leaving his house. That witness was lying, whoever they were. And fingerprints of hers… All she remembered was that her children had been crying and calling out her name when she was arrested.

Suddenly her chest hurt… If she really was a teenager again, that meant that her children hadn't been born. Scott and Beth hadn't even been conceived yet… _If this really is time traveling, or a body swap, or something else, like a divine intervention, then the universe has a sick sense of humor. _Why had she traveled back in time? Why was she here, in this era? Why was she in _this_ period of time, when everything was so fucked up?

Veronica put her head in her hands and sobbed. _If this is a dream, or a nightmare, please let me wake up. I'd rather go to prison for a crime I didn't commit than never see my children again…_

Suddenly there was a knock on the door. "Veronica, are you awake? Breakfast is ready."

Veronica held her breath. It was her mother's voice.

She hadn't seen her mother for 15 years, in her time period. The last time she'd seen her was when Leanne had visited Veronica's house, asking for money. She hadn't even cared about her grandchildren. She only saw the twins for an hour, and then took off again as soon as Veronica had given her the money. And that was the last time she'd seen her.

If her mother was still here, than Aaron was still at large. Veronica remembered that Leanne had taken off immediately after they'd arrested Aaron in the past, after stealing the check for $50,000 from the Kane family.

Aaron was still free.

And if Aaron was still alive, than Cassidy was still alive… Cassidy, who'd raped her, killed her classmates, killed the Mayor, and then committed suicide off the rooftop of the Neptune Grand Hotel...

Veronica felt nauseous. She bolted to the bathroom and threw up in the toilet.

This wasn't happening. Everything that had happened in the past and been settled had returned again. She'd dealt with the whole murder-suicide of Cassidy, the whole trial of Aaron, the near death experiences, Mercer, the Fitzpatrick's, The Castle, Gory Sorokin, and much more… What about her Chlamydia? And everything else that had happened in the last 20 years? She'd moved on from all of that crap. She couldn't re-live it again!

She retched louder this time.

Her mom knocked again, and this time she opened the door. "Honey, are you alright?" Leanne walked into the bathroom to find her daughter, spilling the contents of her stomach into the toilet bowl. "Veronica, what's wrong?" She hurriedly went to her, but Veronica raised her hand to stop her mother.

"Stomach flu. Probably because of that salsa last night," she answered quickly, remembering the taco night with her parents back then. But she just didn't want her mother to be near her. Not now, after all of these years, and _especially_ now that she knew what would happen next.

"Oh, my God. I'm sorry, dear. I'm gonna make you some tea to make you feel better, okay?" her mother said. Veronica didn't answer, but she hurled again. Leanne walked out from her daughter's room to go make some tea in the kitchen.

Veronica cried.

She missed her children. She remembered her children, hugging her and kissing her and saying happy birthday. She missed Scott's handsome face, Beth's beautiful face, their smiles, and their laughter. She didn't want to be in this period of time, reliving the most painful memories and experiences of her life. Her children gave her strength and the will to live her life. She had a good life with her friends and families. Her father and Alicia… Oh, Alicia. What about Wallace and Darrell? They were her brothers now, but in this time period they weren't part of her family yet. What about the other children? Richard, Cameron, Felix, Esmeralda, and Collette… They hadn't been born yet.

This was all fucked up.

She flushed the toilet and sat on the tile floor. She was sobbing. She couldn't relive the terror of Aaron locking her up in the fridge and setting it on fire. Not again, never again! She couldn't relive the hopelessness she'd felt when Cassidy blew up the airplane, and she'd thought her father was on it. She couldn't relive being drugged and almost raped by Mercer. She pulled her knees to her chin and cried.

All of the thoughts, memories, and emotions washed over her like a tidal wave.

Lilly, Duncan, Felix, Meg, Lamb, Logan…

Logan.

She couldn't relive another painful experience with Logan. Their relationship dance, their fights and arguments, their sex, their kisses, their love…

She stood up and stared at her reflection in the mirror. Her eyes were puffy and she was pale, but it wasn't a mistake. She was a teenager again. She laughed and sobbed at the same time.

She stripped all of her clothes off and climbed into the shower. She shrieked when the cold water splashed her. Yeah, she remembered this; the apartment didn't have any hot water. But she took a shower, and scrubbed very hard with soap. When she finished, she dried herself off, sat on her water bed and tried hard to think. What would she do now? She looked at the floor very hard. _Think, Veronica. You're a 38 year old woman trapped in a 17 year old body. You have knowledge about the future; you know what is gonna happen. You need a plan; a plan that will guarantee you that you'll go back to your own timeline._

She got dressed in a pink t-shirt, blue jeans, and a brown jacket. She looked at herself in the mirror, and she laughed. She looked like Beth. _Okay, now I'm dressed up like my daughter. I'd forgotten what it felt like to be a teen, but this ensemble looks cute. And out there in the kitchen, there's my mother who's actually the same age as me. I feel sick and intrigued at the same time._

She grabbed her school bag and opened the door. She walked into the kitchen and saw her mother, reading a newspaper. She looked up and grinned as she pointed to the headline. "Check this out! Your dad is in the newspaper." Veronica read the headline about how Abel Koontz was innocent and the murder was still unsolved; how Keith Mars was a relentless ex-Sheriff who was shunned by the community and now being praised for his determination.

"Thanks for the tea," Veronica said, taking a sip. She glanced at a bottle of water near her mother. She knew it was actually filled with Vodka.

"Don't you wanna read the article?" her mother asked.

"I'm sure I can read it at school with Wallace, and maybe gloat a little," Veronica answered, avoiding eye contact with her mother. Leanne didn't notice anything, but she kept reading the paper. Veronica was about to say something when she noticed her dog. Backup was wagging his tail and looking at her. She wanted to cry… "Backup! Oh, Backup! I missed you!" She got down on her knees and hugged her dog tightly. She scratched Backup's ears and belly, smothering her dog with affection. Leanne looked at her strangely.

"You're acting like you haven't seen Backup for years, honey," her mother commented.

Veronica sniffled and hugged Backup again. She'd missed her dog more than her mother, which was so wrong on so many levels. Backup licked her face, and she laughed. "Good to see you too!" Backup barked happily, thrilled that his master was giving him special attention.

Veronica sat on the stool and ate her breakfast, bacon and eggs. She remembered that her children had given her the same breakfast in bed. She swallowed hard and tried not to cry. Her mother looked at her. "Are you okay? Is your stomach still bothering you?"

Veronica shook her head. "I'm fine. I got it all out of my system. Thanks for the tea…" She smiled awkwardly at Leanne. "Where's dad?"

"He had to go to the office early, dear," Leanne answered while she drank her 'water'. Veronica looked at her mother sadly. It was early morning, and she was already drinking.

"Hey, can I have some of that water?" Veronica asked suddenly, handing her mother her cup. Leanne was startled by her request and almost dropped her bottle. "I don't feel like drinking tap water."

Leanne blinked several times. She clutched her bottle tightly. Veronica stared at her mother with a poker face. Leanne recovered, opening the fridge instead and giving her a new bottle of water. "Here, have a new one. You don't want to get germs or something from me. I've been coughing all morning."

Veronica smiled knowingly.

"Well, I gotta go to school. See you later." She grabbed her keys, and walked to the door while petting Backup. She didn't hug or kiss her mother; which made Leanne frown; but she didn't say anything.

Veronica stood outside her apartment porch for a minute. She looked around the old apartment building with the swimming pool near the beach. It was like she'd never left. She closed her eyes, and enjoyed the morning breeze for a moment. She felt nostalgic, suddenly, while she was standing there. _I'm here again… in this old run down apartment building… There must be a reason why I've been sent back here, to this very moment. But what is it?_

* * *

She was driving her old Le Baron, her trusty rust bucket. Her car wasn't damaged yet from hitting a tree, when Aaron jumped from the backseat to kill her… She shook her head, trying to get rid of the image. As she drove down the street, she looked at the town; it was exactly as she remembered. She drove to her high school, although she felt that she needed to go see her dad. _If you have knowledge of the future, should you keep it to yourself or tell someone about it? And what should you do, change the course of fate? And if you change that… is it possible that you'll change your whole future?_

She needed to tell her dad about Aaron, that it was Aaron who'd killed Lilly. But then what? Would Aaron quietly go to prison instead of trying to kill her and her dad? Would the future change dramatically? Did she have any proof? The only proof was the sex tapes of Lilly and Aaron, which were still hidden in Lilly's room. She needed to get those tapes.

There were many things to be done if she wanted to change fate.

The obvious one, of course, was to put Aaron behind bars. But she didn't want to repeat that near death experience for a second time. There was no way that she would let Aaron get away with his crime. When they'd exonerated Aaron from the murder charge, it was a hard blow for all of them. It felt like all of their hard work was for nothing. Although Aaron had been mysteriously killed by a bullet through his head, it hadn't made Veronica happy that Aaron's reputation was still intact as Hollywood's favorite actor. She needed people to realize what kind of person Aaron was.

And then there was the matter of Cassidy Casablancas.

Cassidy Casablancas, the brother of Dick Casablancas. Dick, who'd become a good friend of hers, but was an asshat in this timeline. Cassidy, alias Beaver… the sociopath who killed his classmates by blowing up a bus… the sociopath who killed the mayor who'd molested him by blowing up a private jet… the sociopath who'd raped her, and tried to kill her and Logan on the rooftop of the Neptune Grand… the sociopath who'd jumped from the top of the building and killed himself…

The murder of Felix Toombs by Thumper… Logan had been accused of the murder, and the bitter war between the 09ers and the PCH bike club had escalated.

The death of Meg… Duncan had run away with his and Meg's baby...

Veronica suddenly realized that she'd arrived at the Neptune High School parking lot, and she'd already parked her car. She was gripping the steering wheel so tight that her knuckles were turning white. She started to have a panic attack. She couldn't be back in high school

She hated high school.

After 4 years of hell, she'd graduated, and vowed to never see anyone ever again apart from her friends. Which was completely IRONIC because she'd just been hurled back in time to the most ridiculous fucked up time of her life. _Those people who say that high school is the BEST experience of their lives? Let them try to live it over and over again… FOREVER._

She stepped out of her car and saw a yellow X-Terra parked nearby. She exhaled heavily when she saw Logan's big ugly car. She didn't think she could see Logan after all these years… What was happening between them in this timeline? Oh yeah, she'd abruptly left his house without saying goodbye, and managed to avoid him for several days after she found cameras in the pool house, and thought those were his.

She guessed this was her chance to fix everything. Maybe she needed to apologize to Logan, and not accuse him of murder…

She walked to campus and saw everyone was there. She stood right in front of the entrance and looked at Lilly's Memorial Fountain. She watched familiar faces walking around. She looked at the quad and saw some 09er students sitting around, reading the newspaper. They were reading the headlines, and some of them noticed Veronica. They were whispering and pointing at her.

_Fuck. I mean, really. This is a fucking nightmare._

And then she saw Cassidy and Dick, arguing. They were also reading the newspaper. She could guess what they were arguing about; their trip to Mexico. Veronica narrowed her eyes at both of them. Somehow, Cassidy realized that he was being watched, and turned around to see that Veronica was watching him.

They stared at each other.

She broke her stare and walked into the school building. Her heart was drumming so fast. She was so angry and so scared at the same time. The boy who'd made her life and everyone's lives hell was still alive.

_Fuck you, time traveling._

Inside the building, she stood in the middle of the hallway. A sea of people was rushing around her, and she felt like drowning. It was an overwhelming feeling coming back to high school again. It wasn't until someone rescued her from hurling herself again; someone tapped her on the shoulder, and she turned around to see Wallace.

"Morning, Superfly. Have you read the newspaper?" Wallace grinned and showed her the newspaper with a picture of her dad. She didn't care about the newspaper. All she cared about was that one of her most trusted friends was there. She didn't answer or say anything, but she wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged her best friend and future step-brother tightly. Seeing Wallace made her want to cry. How young Wallace looked, and how he was always there for her no matter what. How she always took him for granted and he never questioned her motives. How he was always there for her when the shit hit the fan. Wallace was taken aback by her gesture. He awkwardly hugged her back, as some students looked at them strangely. "Okay, nice to see you too Vee."

Veronica let him go and grimaced. "Sorry about that."

Wallace frowned. "What's going on, Vee?"

Veronica shrugged. "Can't I hug my best friend for always being there for me?"

Wallace didn't know what to say, but he looked happy enough. "Well, don't get any ideas or people will talk. I know I'm irresistible but this would damage my reputation." Veronica laughed and wiped a tear that was forming in the corner of her eye. She'd missed young Wallace. "Check this out." He read aloud the article from the newspaper. "Eyewitness Steps Forward: Escort claims she was with Koontz at time of Kane murder. New evidence has also been found. Since his removal from the Sheriff's office, Keith Mars, the outspoken Sheriff, has tersely and single-handedly been doing his own investigation despite being shunned by the community at large."

Veronica smiled. "You think it might be gross to read a love letter to your dad, but I kinda enjoyed it." They walked down the hallway and chatted lively. _I can't believe that I just relived my conversation with Wallace about this…_

"All I know is that if I was him right now, I'd be saying 'I told you so' all over Neptune!" Wallace boasted. Veronica almost didn't hear him; she saw Logan approaching and stopped dead in her tracks. The handsome boy looked up and saw Veronica and Wallace, and he stopped too.

Veronica and Logan stared at each other for an eternity.

Veronica hadn't realized how handsome this man was when he was younger. She suddenly realized how much she'd missed him, after all of these years. Logan was just about to say something, when she abruptly turned around and dragged Wallace to the girls' bathroom, amid his protests. Wallace saw a hurt look on Logan's face. Veronica closed the bathroom door and cursed. "Fuck."

"A blonde pulling me to a girls' bathroom fantasy? RUINED," Wallace said exasperatedly.

"Can you do me a favor?" Veronica tilted her head, and got annoyed when Wallace tilted his head too and parroted her words. _It was annoying back then, it's still annoying now. _Wallace just laughed. "Go outside and tell me when Logan is gone?" she begged.

Wallace chuckled. "Okay." He opened the door and looked at her. "How much longer you think you can avoid him?" He walked out, and Veronica closed the door and leaned against it. _How much longer I can avoid him? I have a lifetime, baby. You're a stupid woman, Veronica. You're a grown, mature woman in her late 30s, and you still get butterflies in your stomach when you see him. A boy… who apparently can make your vajajay squirm. That's just so wrong. I mean, he's only a boy! A seventeen year old boy! And I'm the ultimate cougar! _

Veronica banged her head against the door several times.

* * *

Veronica was sitting in a dark Journalism classroom alone during last period, staring at the computer screen in front of her. She was reading some science articles about time traveling. It was giving her a headache. There were so many theories and science mumbo jumbo that she didn't understand. Predestination, grandfather paradoxes, and all of that shit.

_So basically, these scientists say that I shouldn't change anything in the past because it will change the future. It's a dangerous notion to change the course of time. There are some fixed points of time, and no matter what, I have to just let it be. _Veronica scoffed_. Well, that's easy. I'll just let everyone I know die miserable, violent deaths, while I twiddle my thumbs and hum the theme song of 'I Dream of Jeannie'! What's the purpose of me being here, then? Rewinding everything and remembering the tragedies of my life? Awesome! Maybe I should take pictures this time, so it will last longer. Fucking science._

Veronica, alone in that dark classroom, suddenly felt the hair on the back of her neck stand up. She felt a presence, and turned her head around.

Cassidy was standing at the door.

"Hello."

Veronica stared at him for few seconds and said, "Hey, Cassidy."

Cassidy looked amused when she called him by his real name. "You called me Cassidy instead of Beaver..."

"That's your real name," she said softly. "What can I do for you, Cassidy?" Although she already knew what he was going to say, she wanted to see whether or not she could read him.

"Well there's something you should know, it's for your own good," he said in a flat tone.

Veronica studied his features. She was an excellent detective, with years of experience, and this boy was really sneaky. He was behaving innocently, kind of shy and scared – but deep down, he was a sociopath. She felt pity; because she knew the reason why he'd become a sociopath. "Spill."

"Well, the weekend when Lilly was killed… Me, Dick, and Logan, we were down in Mexico, surfing." He walked closer to her.

She nodded. "I know this."

"Logan, he…uh, he got all worked up and talked about how Lilly was seeing someone he knew." He paused for dramatic effect. "So he got up early that morning, the day that Lilly was murdered, and he drove back to Neptune to see her."

If he was waiting to see Veronica's reaction to this breaking news, he was probably… a bit disappointed that she was having no reaction at all. She just looked at him with an odd expression; like she was trying to read him or something. He watched her as she shifted in her seat and crossed her leg. She thought hard before she spoke. "Why are you telling me this now?"

"What?" Cassidy hadn't expected her to ask him that.

Veronica crossed her arms and stared at Cassidy. Her tone was accusatory. "I mean, why are you just telling me this now? Why didn't you tell me or my dad a year ago? How do I know that you're telling the truth?" She interrogated.

Cassidy felt like he'd been slapped. "I'm telling you the truth."

Veronica narrowed her eyes. "Are you really?" She watched Cassidy's eyes turn dark, and her heart skipped a beat. She had to remind herself that Cassidy was just a boy, and she was a grown woman who shouldn't be intimidated. "You've been withholding information for a year now – you and your brother. That would be considered a felony."

Cassidy stepped forward, his hand clenched. "I didn't think it was necessary to sell out our friend, especially when the murderer had already confessed." He didn't think Veronica would be this difficult. He knew Veronica and Logan were dating now, but for the past several days she'd been avoiding Logan like leper.

"Abel Koontz didn't kill Lilly; you know that now from the investigation. But no matter what, you didn't come forward with this information earlier." She stood up and stepped towards Cassidy. "You seem to have a knack for withholding information."

"What the hell do you mean?" Cassidy asked angrily.

Veronica pondered whether or not she should tell Cassidy that she knew the truth about the rape; that she knew he raped her. But… she was afraid of the consequences. _This time travel rule is really pissing me off._ "Nothing," she replied, finally deciding. She looked at Cassidy with waves of emotion; pity, fear, anger… Cassidy saw all of those looks, and he too was inflicted with many emotions. "I'm just saying, for someone who said that he didn't want to sell out his friend, he definitely threw his friend under the bus when the going got tough."

Cassidy's face turned red, and he looked like he wanted to kill Veronica. It was the look she still remembered well, from when he really _had_ tried to kill her on that rooftop. Right now, they were having a bit of a stand-off. It was as thought they were trying to read each other's minds. "Everyone says that you're a bitch, Veronica. Apparently it's true."

Veronica smirked. That was Beaver talking, not Cassidy. Cassidy looked at her like she was crazy – he was confused why she was asking these questions. He wasn't prepared when she asked again, "What is it to you? What do you hope to gain by telling me about Logan's whereabouts? What are you implying here?" She narrowed her eyes. "Are you implying that Logan killed Lilly?"

"Geez, Veronica. If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're just defending your boyfriend who tormented you for a year," Cassidy said scathingly. "Never mind that I'm trying to be a good citizen."

"This is Neptune. It doesn't count," she replied. "I know people sometimes use their exterior to hide what's underneath." She stepped closer to Cassidy. "And what lies underneath is sometimes more ugly than the outside."

Cassidy looked at her with wide eyes. He looked afraid for a second, but then looked angry. He gritted his teeth and said, "Whatever, Ronnie. I'm just saying that if you don't wanna hear me, it's fine. I'll tell the Sheriff instead, and I have proof: Logan bought Lilly a shot glass in a tourist shop in Ensenada. Look it up, it said _'I got baked in Ensenada'_."

She didn't say anything, only stared hard at Cassidy. She was trying to think of a reason why he was telling her about Logan's whereabouts. It was a mystery she was still trying to solve, even after all these years. Cassidy didn't have anything to gain by implying Logan was the murderer. Even if he hadn't said anything about Logan, the real culprit would have been found, eventually. It didn't make any sense.

"Duly noted," she replied after a moment. Cassidy turned around and walked out of the room in a huff. She didn't see the murderous look on his face.

Veronica sat on the desk and thought very hard. She needed to clear Logan's alibi. Logan was going to have a lot of trouble ahead if she didn't help him. She needed to…

Needed to do what? The time traveling rule said that she shouldn't do anything. Let fate run its course.

Veronica shook her head. _Fuck the rule… There's no way I could let Logan be miserable again. Not from his dad, not from the trial, not from the beatings from the PCHers, and everything else. Not to mention the domino effect that is going to happen. I can't let Felix die… I can't let Meg die… I can't let everyone die at Cassidy's hands… I can't let these bad things happen…_

Veronica put her head in her hands. She was going to take the risk, and change the future. _I'm probably going to destroy the fucking universe._

* * *

Veronica bid Wallace goodbye in the parking lot and walked to her car. She wanted to see Mac, but she wasn't at school. She remembered that Mac had the flu today. Maybe she should visit her. She also wanted to see Meg… but she wasn't at school either. She saw Lizzie, but she just rolled her eyes when she saw Veronica.

Suddenly she noticed that Logan was leaning against his yellow car; he was waiting for her. Veronica gulped and felt trapped. She couldn't talk to Logan now. Her eyes were searching for something, someone, to get her away from Logan. Where was Eli when you needed him?

Instead of Eli, she saw Norris Clayton walking to his car. She immediately had an idea, and walked towards Norris. She hoped Norris would agree. This had nothing to do with not wanting to talk to Logan, but it might save everyone's life. Veronica hopped beside the tall boy and tapped his arm. "Hey, Norris. Do you have a minute? I need your help."

Norris stopped and looked down at the tiny blonde in surprise. After Veronica had cleared his name from an accusation as a school bomber, he'd been trying to get her to talk to him again; but apparently she'd been busy with stuff. Stuff like Logan Echolls. News traveled fast when the King of Neptune High had started dating the super sleuth detective Veronica Mars.

Norris glanced towards Logan, who was frowning. "As much I'm glad that we're finally talking again, Veronica… I don't think I wanna make your boyfriend jealous."

"What? No, it's not that. What the hell do you mean? I need a favor, actually. A big one." She dragged his arm to her car. Norris was confused and a little bit happy, actually, so he followed her. He glanced at Logan again, who was seething. Logan got into his car and burned rubber out the parking lot. Veronica had seen Logan's face, too, and she felt a little bit guilty.

Once they reached her car, she let go of his arm. Norris massaged his arm; for a petite girl, she sure was strong. "Okay… What can I do?" he mumbled.

"Can you teach me how to diffuse a bomb? A bomb that's being controlled by phones, or radio, preferably." The look that Norris had was priceless. He blinked and stared at Veronica in surprise. And then he looked around worriedly.

"I don't know anything about bombs," he said in a very low voice. "You know I've been cleared of everything."

Veronica realized that Norris probably thought that she was trying to trap him. "No, no, Norris… I'm not trying to set you up. I'm being serious. I'm… on a case, right now. And it involves explosives and such. I have a suspect that might try to use this kind of expertise to set up a bomb. Just in case, I need to be able to diffuse it. You're the only weapons expert that I know in this school. It's not like I can go up to the Bomb Squad and just ask them."

Norris looked at her, bewildered. "Veronica, that sounds dangerous! Don't you think you should call the authorities or something?"

Veronica leaned her back against her car and crossed her arms. "I can't tell the authorities right now, because I don't have any proof and it hasn't happened yet – but I stumbled along this…plan accidentally. Until I have some kind of proof, I need to be able to do… something to prevent it. I may need to take drastic measures."

Norris shook his head like she was crazy. "Veronica, I don't know whether I can help you or not."

"If you can't help me, maybe you know someone who could?" she asked.

"That's not what I meant. I meant that's the craziest thing I've ever heard. Diffuse a bomb? What are you, Sidney Bristow?" Norris said.

"Norris…," she said calmly. "If you can and will help me, I promise I will go to that Japanese Weapon Exhibition with you – as a friend, of course."

Norris' eyes widened. "What about your boyfriend?"

"You want him to come too? Okay, I'll tell him." she shrugged.

Norris smiled and sighed. "That's not what I meant…"

"So, can you help me?" She tilted her head to the side. Norris realized how dangerous Veronica was when she tilted her head like that; nobody could resist her.

He nodded slowly. "I might be able to help you. But no one can know about this."

"Deal," she said, offering her hand. Norris shook her hand, noticing how soft her hand was but that she had a very firm grip.

"I'll call you," he said. Norris waved and walked away. Veronica waved back, and then closed her eyes. She hoped she was doing the right thing. She knew that in the future, Norris would become a weapons expert for the FBI. She'd worked with him several times, in the future. Hopefully, her request wouldn't change that. Before she got into her car, someone spoke up behind her.

"Moving on to a greener pasture, Ronnie - Or in this case, a terrorist in the making?" She turned around and saw that Dick Casablancas was leering at her. It was apparent that he was still pissed at her for destroying his precious surf board, and for finding out that Logan was dating her a few days ago. "I know that guys with violent tendencies turn you on, but I guess it's a step up from Weevil and the PCHers. At least Clayton is not THAT poor."

Veronica was silent. It was a dilemma, really. Dick Casablancas was her friend in the future, and she'd already forgiven him for his mistakes. His kids were her kids' friends. He'd gotten married to Mac in the future, and had a happy life. But Dick Casablancas in this timeline was an asshole. Someone who'd let his brother rape her, someone who had a hand in her being drugged and raped, someone who'd called her a slut, and many other derogatory names, for a whole year; someone who'd spread a sex video of her with Piz to everyone in college…_Well, this is my chance to fix everything. Maybe I should just castrate him now to save some time. I can't believe that he's such a fucking idiot in high school. Mac turned him upside down, apparently. And he ended up becoming one of the nicest guys, in the future. But now? I have to deal with his teenage idiocy._

"Yeah, I don't have time for you. Maybe you should pay more attention to your brother; he has a tendency to stir up trouble." She opened her car door.

"What the fuck do you mean by that?" Dick asked angrily.

She paused and stared at him hard. "Cassidy just told me that Logan came back to Neptune from Mexico to see Lilly, the day she died." Dick looked at her, horrified. "He said that he will go to the Sheriff about this information if I don't do something about it."

"What?" Dick yelled.

"I decided that I won't do anything about it until I have all the proof I need." She looked at Dick. "I trust Logan completely, Dick," she said softly, and Dick was stunned. "I can see why you didn't rat him out; you're a loyal friend to Logan. And probably will be, always and forever…" Her tone was kind. Dick didn't say anything, only stared at her. "It's your brother that I don't trust. But there's a reason for that." She looked at him sadly when she talked about Cassidy. "Be kind to him, Dick. He's the only brother you have."

Dick looked at her, speechless. He was ready for banter and insults, but instead he'd gotten soft words from her about his loyalty. And she trusted Logan completely, she said. Maybe their feelings were deeper than he thought. Then why had she been avoiding Logan like the plague, for these past few days? Dick had to endure Logan's moping about her.

"Ronnie, what the hell are you talking about?" Dick finally asked. Veronica shook her head, and got into her car. She didn't have time for Dick now. She needed to go straighten things out. Dick watched her drive away from the school parking lot with a frown. He looked around, and saw that his brother was walking towards his own car. Dick was fuming, and he barked to his brother. "BEAVER!" Cassidy stopped walking and looked at his furious brother walking towards him. "What the fuck did you tell Ronnie!"

Cassidy didn't wait for his brother get close enough to kick his ass. He hurriedly got into his car, locked the door, and turned on the ignition. Dick knocked on the window and tried to get in, but Cassidy hit the gas and drove away from his brother.

* * *

Veronica sat in her car, looking at the house across the street. She was pondering whether she should do this. This was a new territory for her; knowledge was a dangerous thing. She knew everything that would happen in the future. But if she tried to change it, then the future would also change, right?

Veronica closed her eyes. _Would Scott and Beth cease to exist?_

She sniffled. She missed her children so much. No mother should experience this kind of… Whatever this was.

She had a look of determination on her face when she got out of her car and closed the door forcefully. She walked to the house across the street purposefully, although she could hear the beating of her heart so loud; it seemed her heart was going to burst out from her chest.

She stood in front of the front door and rang the bell.

When the door opened, she swallowed. He looked at her; mesmerized at first, and then with confusion and hatred and so many emotions rolled into one.

"What the hell do you want, Veronica?" asked Duncan.


End file.
